1. You wake up face down on the pavement.

2. You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.

3. You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.

4. Your son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant
would mind her own business.

5. You want to put on the clothes you wore home
from last night's party - and there aren't any.

6. You turn on the news and they're showing
emergency routes out of the city.

7. Your twin sister forgets your birthday.

8. You wake up to discover that your waterbed broke and then realize that you don't have a waterbed.

9.Your horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.

10. You see the "60 Minutes" News Team waiting in your office.

11. Your boss tells you not to bother to take off you coat.

12. You walk to work and discover that your dress
is tucked in the back of your pantyhose.

13. Your kid says "Did you know that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet?"

14. Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

15. You wake up too late to catch the van pool - then you realize that you're driving the van this week.

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